“Going out” - learnings for toddlers from Montessori 6-12 year olds
A key part of the ‘second plane’ of the Montessori approach is empowering bigger kids (6-12) to access and explore the world beyond the setting. ‘Going out” is a framework for excursions that are child led; forget a field trip where adult experts herd and lecture the kids, this is all about applying classroom curiosity to the world beyond. The mixed-ages at Playhood were a great learning experience for our younger son, but now having an older child entering an elementary programme, I’ve been learning about this and trying out some new habits at home to support burgeoning independence over the summer, and like everything in family life, the younger one is always watching (and learning) along the way…
Feelings of autonomy and experience of self-determination are supported by giving the child the power to make decisions and the tools to act on them. Our 8 year old definitely wants to take more risks - cooking his own lunch using the stove, going biking without being always in sight etc. and the 4 year old is hungry to earn trust too.
Pardon the tangent but might this letting go possibly make life easier for the parent too? Yup, it turns out having a bit of faith in your kids is surprisingly liberating. The kitchen calendar shouldn’t stay the domain of one decision-maker and play dates no longer need activity planning or so much coordination after all. I’ve been reflecting on how the pandemic has required our kids go with the flow a little more on last minute cancellations, adapting to restrictions and frustrating changes of plans. They’ve just had to, with so much uncertainty and heightened caution. The discussions and planning process to Go Out also mean gratification is not very immediate which is healthy to learn!
Impact on the toddler we’ve seen, with some ideas to try:
Healthier screen time: the internet is our go-to research tool now and guiding children to look up useful information (opening times, train frequency, weather forecasts, accessibility details and so on) really broadens their horizons of what your device does beyond Netflix auto-play! For the older ones, planning a budget and route then managing money and navigation and so on will be key. Getting the hang of voice search on on Google, Amazon or Apple devices before they’re ready to type in search engines gives younger kids options when looking for their own answers. And they can ask for jokes or songs too, of course. Reverse image search is extremely helpful when their grownup has no idea what that bug is and is also curious if it is likely to bite!
Better grasp of the calendar: a young child’s curiosity and confusion about units of measure can be cute (“Can we go the day before tomorrow?” “Pinch punch first of the new year!” Etc) but it’s been really helpful for the littler one to hear more discussion of the weekdays in practical terms and take part in looking ahead to plans over the coming months. Getting them familiar with their regular events (like our Simmy’s music session every Thursday) with recognisable stickers on the calendar or little drawings can represent what’s going on in ways accessible to younger ones.
Ownership and responsibility: a subtle but positive shift from demanding snacks and the parent’s bag being a Mary Poppins-style hold-all of anything they’d ever need, to conversations about what items we will take our with us, appropriate to the outing, and then taking care of their own packed bag. The pride in being the one to provide a plaster when a scrape occurred was a sweet blend of role-playing parent and genuine kindness recently! Instead of that mental note to bring something to entertain them in the cafe, asking aloud what they think they might want to do while we wait for our food to come sort of lightens the load a little.
In summary, they aren’t ever really passive passengers, so we often can do more to engage little ones in errands or outings and hopefully investing in the prep makes it less stressful later on.
Further reading ideas:
Childhood to Adolescent - Maria Montessori
‘Just as it is necessary to help the baby while he is taking his first steps, so is it also necessary to help the child while he is taking his first steps in the world of abstraction… The role of education is to interest the child profoundly in an external activity to which he will give all his potential.“ (From Childhood to Adolescence, page 11, Maria Montessori)
Georgia Norton is a strategy and communications consultant and mum to a 8 and 4 year old.
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